Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Vanity Fair

Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. It has kind of been hard with all that has gone on with me lately. I think things may have finally settled down for awhile, which is way good for me. I have been able to maintain my friendship with the person I wrote about in the previous post and while it is different, it is deeper and it is good. I consider myself very fortunate to have him as a friend. Also, I have been on two dates with a really nice guy. I don't know where it will go, but I am taking the advice that has been given me and am just having fun right now with no expectations. In a couple of weeks, I FINALLY get to get away for a little while. I will be going to Sarasota, Florida for two weeks. My favorite aunt lives there and I get to spend a lot of time down there in the spring and fall. It will be so nice to get away from my soul-sucking job for a little while and sit on the beach and be refreshed by the surf. This is the place I want to move to when I retire in 12 years. (I know it seems like a long time, but it really is not). Memphis is a cesspool of crime, corrupt politics and horrible race relations. Bad thing is, it will never get any better. I have a few friends down in Sarasota and it is hard to explain, but I really feel like I am home when I am there -- even more so than being in Memphis.

Memphis holds an annual Fair in the fall. I went last night with some friends and had a ball. Ate all manner of things that were not good for us. But we justified it by going to exercise class right before. Personally, I didn't eat as much as one particular, above-mentioned individual did. He ate everything in sight. This place has fried Oreos, turkey legs and fiddle-sticks. If it can die or fry, they have it. I tasted some fried pickles that were so good they would make you slap yo mama. And of course, there was the obligatory beer. Following the Fair, we went to a local restaurant called the Beauty Shop for drinks. This actually was an old beauty shop and you can sit under the old hair dryers and eat. It is very chic and trendy. Oh, I saw the HOTTEST guy in the whole world in there. He is a bartender at another restaurant in Memphis owned by the same woman that owns Beauty Shop. Last week, he talked to me for awhile when it was slow at the bar and he came over and said hello to me. Believe me when I say that I could give up my absolute last strand of moral fiber that I possess for this one. Alas, he is married - the wife was with him. (sigh) All in all, we had a really good time. It is nice to finally have some stability back. But knowing me, who knows how long that will last...

Thursday, September 13, 2007

I'm Back

Sorry for my absence in posting for so long...I have had a lot of drama and trauma lately. I believe it has all worked itself out for the best. Long story short, right after I came out, I fell for one of my best friends. Hard. He didn't feel the same way about me. I let my feelings run away with me and, very recently, I was forced to get them under control and deal with them. I have learned and am learning that is a hard thing to do but it is doable. I am very fortunate in that I have the very best friends a guy could ever hope to have, thankfully, which still includes the friend that I fell for. My friends have listened to me and held me when I cried. Growth can be a difficult thing, but it is worth it. The fact that I can write that last sentence says a whole hell of a lot considering where I have just come from. So...I am back ... with a vengeance.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007


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