Thursday, July 17, 2008

I Wanna Be a Skinny Bitch...

Damn it!!! I have to go on a diet again. My fat ass is making my ass look fat. I hate diets. I wish I could eat everything I wanted. Alas, I cannot as I am not tall. I was going to say I have been working out like a fiend but that might be stretching the truth just a touch. Actually, I have been taking a group barbell class that I have really enjoyed. Know what I enjoy even more??? Going out after class to eat had drink beer. Yes, folks, the beer has struck back. But I can't not drink. Especially with the job I have that I hate. Drinking is the glue that has held my universe together, ESPECIALLY when I have had a day like I had today where I have had to deal with the stupidest people that God ever breathed breath into. Unfortunately, it has packed on the poundage. I have to go to the cardiologist tomorrow and he is going to scream at me in that meek, genteel British accent that he has.

I started SlimFast earlier this week. The concept is fine...reduce you calories for your first two meals of the day and eat what you want (within reason) for dinner. Sounds great, right? Try it. The shakes are actually quite good and I always want three or four of them -- along with breakfast. Then you come to the realization that you are starving to death!!! And you get that hungry headache. I am drinking a ton of green tea on top of that as I read that green tea is good for losing weight in addition to diet and exercise. Love the green tea... The thing is I don't need to loose a ton of weight, just 20 lbs or so. I loathe, hate and despise all those skinny little bitches out there (like the ones in the pictures) and want to slap them all down...repeatedly about the head and shoulders until they scream and beg for mercy at which time I will make mad, passionate love to them and ultimately forgive them for being the skinny bitches that they are, making me look bad by comparison. Do I have an anger issue on top of a weight problem??? Hmmmm... Another blog topic perhaps. So I persevere and deny myself the fruits of life. Maybe I just need to get my mouth wired shut. I have a feeling several people in my life would readily agree. That's ok... I'll bitch about them later. Psychotic post over.


Kelly said...

good luck with it.. i know it is tough...i am fighting the fight too...only 15 more pounds for me

borg_queen said...

Minimize carbs like yeah beer. Eat only light at dinner as opposed to your shake diet. You can eat well during breakfast and lunch but don't eat a lot at dinner and none at all before sleep.

cb said...

First, I feel your pain on wanting to get thinner. BELIEVE me.

Second, I think all the pictures you posted are of muscular, albeit 0% bodyfat men. Whom I hate even more than the skinny twinkbois.

Third, wiring your jaw shut will in NO way preclude you from drinking beer.

Blogger said...

New Diet Taps into Innovative Plan to Help Dieters Lose 20 Pounds within Just 21 Days!


Free Hit Counters
Staples Coupon Codes