Monday, November 26, 2007

Aftermath of Bird Day...

Nowhere but in the U.S. do we devote a whole day unto gathering around and eating the carcass of a large bird. I certainly put myself into a food coma. God, now I'm back at work. I have always maintained that if you get a short week at work, you WILL pay for in, one way or another. Actually, the day itself was pretty uneventful (though I did have to get out at one point and partake of an adult beverage or four). The next morning I foolishly went willingly to an area of mass commerce in order to make a return. (I bought a belt the night before The Day and STOOPID me did not try it on in the store and was horribly surprised when I discovered that the ends didn't even meet. Damn those stores and their faulty sizing.) I emerged victorious and spent the rest of the day enjoying my company. Later that evening, a friend of mine and I went to see Rent which was in town. I have seen it once and the movie countless times, but she had not so I thought what the hell. I thought it was nearly as good as the first time I had seen it. My friend dropped me off at my favorite night spot to wait for my friend that I fell for (hereafter referred to as HotAss). HotAss was supposed to meet me at the club but while I was at the show, wandered off with and individual of questionable repute (my opinion here). He met me back up there (good thing) as I had no ride and I would have had to kill him despite how fond I have grown of him. We stayed there for awhile and met some people and decided a change of venue was in order. What proceeded was nothing short of a bar tour of Memphis. Much later we decided to get something to eat.

The next day, when I went to work at my low-paying albeit fun part-time job, they told me I looked like hell. I said my friend and I had brunch. Can it still be brunch if it is at CK's Coffee Shop at 3:30 in the morning and you are as drunk as HELL? I say yes. Sounds more reputable. Needless to say, the next day was somewhat difficult to get through. Then I had to go to a tree-trimming party that night which is always a hoot. This year was no exception.

My favorite aunt from Florida was in and we had a nice visit. Except for one reallllllly minor thing that to me isn't so minor. When I was over at my friend's house (we'll call her Undisciplined Dog Lady or UDL... you have NO idea. Really, you don't) for a Christmas tree viewing, I made the comment that after her Golden Retriever got finished attacking me, that I would need to go to the Rape Crisis Center and get checked out. My lovely aunt states WITH ME IN THE ROOM that that is the only sex I have had, that she knows about, but she really doesn't know that much about me. See, I have not come out to her and there is a good reason. I DON'T WANT TO. I hate it when she fishes for clues for clues about my sexuality. The reason I don't want to tell her anything is that she tends to tell me what to do about everything, like she knows what is best for me. That is fine when she is decorating my house as she is a good decorator, but not about the gender of those to whom I am attracted. She would be totally fine with me being gay, but I just don't want her all up in my bidness. I would never hear the end of it. She would want to know every detail and all about who I am seeing or she would try to fix me up with people or God knows what else. Thank you just the same, no.

All that said, I really enjoyed the weekend and I got to see the guy I am kinda interested in...but I think I will leave that for the next post...Now, for a funny...

The Maid asked for a raise:

The Madam was very upset about this and asked: 'Now Maria, why do you want an increase?'

Maria: Well Senora, there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you.
Madam: 'Who said you iron better than me?'

Maria: 'The Master said so.'
Madam: 'Oh.'

Maria: 'The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.'
Madam: 'Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than I?'

Maria: 'The Master did.'
Madam: 'Oh.'

Maria: 'My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.'
Madam (very upset now): 'Did the Master say so as well?'

Maria: 'No Senora, the gardener did.'


Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Happy Bird Day

I wanted to take a moment and wish all of my blogger friends out there a happy and SAFE Thanksgiving. It has been super fun getting to know some of you and I look forward to sharing more of your lives thru your blogs. I know it's turned into a cliche, but it is always good to think on what we are thankful for. It's all about perspective, people. For me, I have SOOOOOOOOOOOO much for which to be thankful. My friends and family just to name a few. I am alive and well and I don't take that for granted since that unfortunate cardiac event a few years back. Another thing that I am grateful for is that this year I learned I (that would be me - this person sitting here at the keyboard) am actually capable of having feelings for someone. Wow. It has been a good, stressful, eventful, frightening, joyful, frustrating, exhilarating year and I am thankful for it all.

After coming out, I am in a completely different place than I was last year and that is SUCH a good thing. For the first time in my life, if feel as if life is there to be lived and lived to the fullest and although it has taken me almost 40 years, I am truly grateful that I have realized it. I hope you enjoy the time you spend with your family, friends and loved ones. Now, take a moment and be thankful for me and the eye-candy that I so graciously provide for your enjoyment.

Blessings to all...

Monday, November 19, 2007

A Funny ...

It's silly, I know. But I had to share it...

Judge asked prostitute, "So when did you realize you were raped?"

Prostitute replied, wiping her tears, "When the check bounced."

Yoy know it was funny ...

Friday, November 16, 2007

The holidays are here !!!!!

I am so looking forward to the holidays, especially this weekend. Tonite, a couple of friends and myself are going to the Memphis College of Art Holiday Bazaar. The local art college does this once a year around Thanksgiving where students, faculty and alums sell their art. It is really fun -- great art and I always run into people (read cute guys as well as legitimate friends). And then there is the wine. Saturday night, I am going to dinner with a few friends and following that, we are planning to go out to my new favorite hotspot, the new upscale gay bar. My favorite local jazz chanteuse plays on the weekends and I just adore her. She adores me too. I get to sit on the bench beside her as she plays (I just love favoritism, when I am the favorite). God only knows where we will end up after that. Sunday night is the really fun night. For many years now, one of my best friends has a Thanksgiving dinner at her house. FOR FORTY PEOPLE. Yes, 40. Tables are set up, fresh flowers are all over the place. Huge centerpiece on the table. It gets tight with all those people, but that is half the fun. It is very intimate, which is hard to imagine with all those people there, but really, it is. She always holds the dinner on a Sunday night so as not to interfere with everyone's holiday travel plans. We get to see people that we don't get to see all year long, due to hectic schedules, kids and such silliness. For me, this dinner is the kickoff for the holiday season. Also, this one is a little bittersweet as the one that has my heart is moving in a couple of months and this may be his last Thanksgiving dinner with us in Memphis for awhile, depending on whether or not he can get off to come back. My very favorite aunt that lives in Sarasota, Florida is flying into town today for the week. God knows what trouble we can get into or, more accurately, what she will talk me into buying for my house that I don't need nor can afford. I know I sound giddy, but I just love the holidays and am really looking forward to this week. I do have to work Monday - Wednesday, but I don't really mind going into work as so many people take time off and things are a bit more relaxed.

And now for the most important thing. I have made a magical new discovery on HGTV last night. His name is Carter Oosterhouse (sigh) and apparently he has his own show about carpentry. Something tells me he is ... ahem... quite handy. I can certainly think of a few things he could do. Just look at him. I mean take a good look. My goodness gracious...Now, if he would just call me up and ask me to marry him...Hey - a guy can dream.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Today's musing...

I was trying to think of something interesting to post about and I have come to the conclusion that things have gotten pretty much back to normal for me. Unfortunately, normal can mean unintersting. Just recently, one of my dearest friends got out of a disasterous relationship (if you can call it that) catch up, read a couple of posts back -- I wont reinvent the wheel here. Suffice to say, that for the moment, we are all drama-free. I was filling another friend in on the lastest events a couple of days ago and we started talking about how hard it is for a guy to find another decent guy out there. I know it happens. I have read about it. I told my friend that got out of the "relationship" that he is not allowed to date anymore. And I was told that I'm not allowed to either. My track record in this area has turned out to be less than stellar. I have discovered that finding freaks is like shooting fish in a barrell -- you just can't miss. So that brings me to my question. Where in hell do I find a good one? Come on people, weigh in. Brad, if you are reading, tell me SPECIFICALLY where in Memphis I should look. Some friends have made the comment that my problem is is that I am finding guys in bars. Well DUH. Unless I am missing something, there is not many other places to meet people, at least in Memphis. Most of our city is extremely consevative, so its not like you can go to church to find someone. I guess mostly I'm getting increasing cynical about what I'm seeing out there. Based on my brief forays into the dating world as well as watching my friend and his fiasco, I'm getting to the point where the first thing I think when I meet someone, or look at them for that matter, is "what is wrong with you?" The way I look at it is that I'm a pretty good guy and I would like to think there is someone out there for me. Oh well, just ranting and being whiney today for lack of better things to do... In the meantime...lets take a look at my future husband. Something tells me he's nice to his mother...

Friday, November 9, 2007

Monday, November 5, 2007


As I mentioned in the previous post, I had a date Friday night. Where to start??? I had a really nice time with K. He is a great conversationalist. We went to a mid-town restaurant and had a perfectly lovely dinner. Following that, we went for drinks to an upscale gay lounge that is new to Memphis. Had a very nice time there. He just passed his boards or something like that to be a masseuse. WOW - what hands. While were in the lounge, he was rubbing my back and neck and I felt like I was in heaven. I swear, with all the wine and neck rubbing, he could have thrown me into the trunk, taken me out in the country and cut me up in a million pieces and I wouldn't have cared less. I was tired because we had been out to a club the night before and I was fading fast, so we called it an early night. Did I mention what a GREAT kisser he is? Slap my ass and call me Judy. Phew... I cannot tell you how perfect the night was.

I will not be going out with him again.

There is ALWAYS a fly in the ointment. I wont bore you with all of this again (read the older posts to find out what happened previously on Dallas) but I was set up on this date by the semi-boyfriend of the guy I fell for this summer (one of my very dearest friends). K was the boyfriend's best friend. Follow that? No? Good. My friends' boyfriend had befriended me when he started dating my friend, presumably as a result of the circumstances of how they met (which involved me getting hurt). I thought this guy was trying to keep me from being hurt any more than I already was. Come to find out, he was saying one thing to me and another to my friend. And when I say one thing, I mean lots and lots of things. In short, he was playing both of us like a fiddle. Until my friend and I started comparing notes and realized that things aren't always as they appear. I think the ex-boyfriend is a complete freak to manipulate both of us the way he did. TOTAL head games. I'm sorry, but if you are dating someone and you want to trash them are you going to do it to your boyfriend's best friend WHILE you are telling the boyfriend that you love him? See what I was dealing with??? I'm still not sure what the reasoning behind all of this was but it no longer matters. My friend nor I want to have anything to do with behavior of this kind. I count myself very fortunate that I still have his friendship after all of this. I heard this stuff and I did not tell him. Which was wrong of me. Very wrong. He was very mad at me when he heard this - understandably so. It shows what a good guy he is that he forgave me.

The next night, we (my friend and I) went dancing and all is well with the world. That is until I woke up with the hangover. As luck would have it, before we went dancing, we went to the same lounge where I had my date, and I left with a telephone number. Let the drama resume...

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Friday night...

Y'all wish me luck. God knows I'm gonna need it. Looks like I have a date Friday night. If you read the post just below the mooning and flashing pumpkins, you will find that the victim will be K. He is sooooooo cute and hot. And nice to boot. I really like this guy and am somewhat nervous, but excited at the same time. And dammit, I HATE the fact that I gained a few pounds in Florida. Damn to hell those wretched french fries and their eternal siren song. Just got a call from a friend of mine and we were talking about the guy that I fell for this summer. She mentioned that he is leaving (as if I would just somehow happen to forget that fact) and that he will be gone before I know it. I hate it when people say things like that. It is just insensitive. I have been dreading that for quite a while now and just because I have come to terms with things does not make the prospect of him leaving any easier because he is still a dear, dear friend. Sorry people, I was just having a moment. Its weird to be so excited about meeting someone new and missing someone already. Of course, if anyone can screw a date up, it will be me. So pray to the date gods that I don't do or say something completely stoopid, as I am wont to do on occasion. (Despite what you may think, I am not a perfect person). As for the eye candy today, let me introduce actor Jamie Bamber. This fetching young man plays Apollo on the SciFi series Battlestar Galactaca. I have not been a viewer of this fine series, but that may have to change as it apparently has some very good things going for it...


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