Tough Time...

This is a hard post to write, possibly the hardest one I will ever write and will probably explain why I haven't posted in awhile. In less than a month, one of my two best friends is moving away from Memphis. Long and short of it is - I'm not having an easy time of it. At all. I debated on whether or not to post something so intensely personal, but then I thought, hell - this is my blog and writing has always proved to be cathartic. So there. Not to mention, it will be interesting to read this again in 6 months from (hopefully) a different and less painful perspective.

I'll be honest -- it is hard to write this as I am on the edge of tears even now. I can't find the words to express the thought of not being around someone I have grown to care about so much. Although I have known this person for almost 15 years, the last 6 months have been life-changing. I have come to know the kindest and most sensitive person. If you knew him, you would know that the words "kind" and "sensitive" are not the first words that come to mind. He is anxious to leave Memphis and start over. I certainly understand that for I have seen the need in my own life to get away, but I will admit here that I have been too chicken-shit to actually do anything about it. All the practical and common sense reasons point to why it is good thing for him to go -- but, God, it hurts.

On top of that, it is hard for me to tell him how much he means to me as well as to his other friends. I take that back -- it is easy for me to tell him, which I have done, but it is not so easy to get him to really understand what he means to his friends and why they truly care about him and love him so much.

So, anyway, it is not easy facing the prospect of such a good friend being gone. There will definitely be a big hole in my life that I will have to learn to deal with. And it will be hard to go to all of our favorite haunts by myself. I will go. I certainly have the confidence in myself to go, even alone and have fun, but there will be so many memories attached that I wont be able to avoid.

I am throwing a going away party for him this weekend. I figure there will be about 25 people in my tiny (and I do mean tiny) house. I hope this thing goes off well and doesn't turn into a complete disaster. I am hardly Martha Stewart. Anyhoo --sorry I haven't blogged for so long. There has been a lot going on and it has been rather distracting. Thanks for reading...